Emily Jin
Northwestern University
Earth and Planetary Science
I often tell others that my consistent procrastination is a unique time-management skill, yet the truth is that I've always struggled to fight across perfectionism. I try to avoid anything out of sync, but during that physics experiment, I found myself staring at a jumble of data that refused to show a trend. Three weeks of futile effort left me spiralling into anxiety, until my physics teacher stood by the detector and told me: "Look for the reason of the failure, rather than repeating the unsuccessful procedure." That moment was a revelation. It made me realise that this emphasis on the "process" over "result" had already subtly woven itself into the way every Pao School student thinks.
Reflecting on my twelve-year journey at Pao School, I used to be the student who studied in solitude, never daring to let others hear my voice. At PTSC conferences, my parents were often told by teachers that "Emily is earnest but too quiet." This defensive wall of silence was finally pierced by my teacher while I was preparing for my Chinese Individual Oral Test (IO). She saw right through me, asking pointedly: "Are you obsessing over minor details just to avoid editing the core arguments? Are you afraid of falling short of my expectations, or your own?"
Emily Jin participated in competitions during her time at school
In that instant, I realised that Pao School's greatest value lies in the reshaping of self through education. The role of our teachers extends beyond the delivery of a diploma; they guide us to face our inner selves. I realised how my obsession with details was essentially a form of avoidance, an attempt to use partial perfection to mask the lack of progress. The critical thinking skills emphasised by Pao School actually requires us to have the courage to constantly overturn our previous ideas.
Through my exploration of Geology, I realized how infinitesimally small we humans are compared to billions of years of geological time. Paradoxically, this sense of insignificance became my motivation to seek more knowledge. If even millions of years of evolution eventually fade into silence, then I guess the shame I felt from chasing perfection was truly negligible.
This new perspective was verified during my CS IA website development. Initially, I was trapped in the mindset that everything must be done by myself. But within this supportive community, I learned to let go of my ego. When I finally took my bug-ridden code to my teachers and seniors for help, I realized that the problems that had haunted me for days were actually quite trivial.
"Make it exist first, then make it good later." is no longer just a slogan to me. It is my guiding principle. I've learned that in an inclusive community like ours, showing an imperfect process is a sign of strength, not weakness. Every hand raised in class and every office-hour visit has made me more willing to share my authentic perspective.
As I prepare to step into a wider world, I still feel small, but I am no longer afraid. Twelve years at Pao School have given me resilience rooted in the earth. Whether or not my future research yields immediate results, I know that as long as I maintain my curiosity, every imperfection is simply a necessary step on the path toward the truth.
Move forward step by step, in my own time
Sarah Liao
Oxford University PPE
After I transferred to Pao School I was often asked,"Why did you transfer to Pao School?" Only after spending a few years at Pao School, and looking back, did I realise that what I had wanted was never to be pushed along, but to find my own reason for moving forward.
One major benefit of Pao School was that it broadened my life beyond academics, giving me room to slow down, experiment, reflect, and discover what I truly enjoy.
Thanks to Pao School's strong language environment and my teachers' encouragement, I returned to writing English creative fiction which I had long abandoned. In conversations with friends I listened to different perspectives and enjoyed the thrill of exchanging ideas. Following my own interests, I took electives like drama and history that I had not had the chance to try before.
Life at Pao School also sharpened my ability to seek and seize opportunities. By founding my own club, recruiting members, and securing sponsorship from the Pao School Social Action, I was fortunate to receive support from like-minded friends, which allowed me to put down roots in the areas I truly love and stay true to my interests.
Pao School's house system brought me closer to my classmates. The close-knit boarding community, along with the care of my dorm supervisor and roommates, quickly eased my worries about living away from home. My friends and I celebrate birthdays together, exchange cards and sweets during the holidays, and spend time chatting and singing karaoke in the common area. As Head Prefect, I was able to serve as a bridge between teachers and students. These small moments made me happier, more confident, and more attentive to the community around me.
Choosing PPE (Philosophy, Politics and Economics) might sound like a "rational" choice because of its course design, career prospects, and academic reputation, but for me it felt like a natural progression. In history class I read about ordinary people in World War II making everyday compromises and quiet acts of resistance under totalitarian rule. In economics I began to see why some policies fail in practice. After class, a few friends and I read the introductory philosophy book Think, and as the title suggests I realised I didn't want a discipline's definitive answers so much as to understand and to move ever closer to those complex questions of power and justice, the individual and the collective, and the choices and costs behind every decision.
My time at Pao School taught me not to follow everyone else's pace, but to move forward step by step, in my own time. The courage to slow down and the confidence to risk making mistakes are the most precious lessons that I take away.
